Who's going first?

I remember sitting in a church service years ago when our Pastor was teaching on marriage and relationships.  I don't remember the whole message but this is what I do remember:
From the front he offered this advice "If you're waiting around for things to change or get better, and telling yourself I will do this and that as soon as (insert spouse name here) does this or that and your always wondering who goes first, I've got the answer-It's YOU!"  I can clearly remember being on the edge of my seat anticipating his call to the husbands to step up their game and lead their wives by example.  Ha!!  That is not what I got. I got the call.  All of us did!  He wasn't initiating action in any one person or genre of people, he was initiating action in all of us.  I quickly drew to mind the lesson my Nanny had been teaching my whole life, the same lesson I remind my children of almost daily "treat others the way you WANT to be treated, not the way you WERE treated". 
Over the years since then, I have drawn on that plea many times.  Not just in my marriage relationship, but in many interactions.  It isn't always easy.  In fact there have been many times that I would remember this thought, consciously, and ignore it.  There are times when my deep sense of entitlement roars it's head like an ugly lion.  When I feel like I deserve better treatment, I feel like, well the same way the person I may be dealing with is feeling. The cycle will continue to spin completely out of control as long as we are all waiting to decide who goes first.
We are studying the book of Philippians in our small group right now.  This week, we studied the latter part of Phil. 1.  As we talked about how these verses affected us, many helpful insights were shared.  It wasn't until later in the week, when I was in the position I've found myself in many times, that I realized how God was using these Words to battle my sense of entitlement.
Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. Phil. 1:27
This is when Paul is addressing the church from prison.  He has been wronged and hurt, yet is still calling on the church (us) to represent Christ in all we do.  He doesn't say if your husband/neighbor/parent/friend/boss/coworker/guy who cut you off/teacher/child/sister/brother treats you bad, it must be because they want you to treat him/her the same.  Paul says WHATEVER HAPPENS, BEHAVE!!  Just like what my Nanny taught me, just like I try to teach my kids, just like I NEED TO REMEMBER.